Occupation: Random Man
Quote: "Nobody likes a smartarse. Oops."
Heroes: Nikola Tesla, Freddie Mercury, Hunter S Thompson
Distinguishing features: Prolapsed eardrums from standing next to Marshall stacks; "RPOz" branded on right buttcheek (wanna see?)
Brazen Buck Blowout V
AKA: 5 Buck
Location: In da house
Quote: "Anyone got a puncture kit?" and "Oh no, has anyone got a five buck note??"
Heroes: The Rat Patrol
Location: da 'Berra and da Land of da Freeeeeee — weee!!
Loves: Surprises; Dark bushes; Chocolate; The Constabulary; Wine by the bottle; walking when she's way too smashed to ride
Charchie Brown Finger
Occupation: being the most wikidest mo fo hoe, innit
Industry: you is asking that jus cos I is black
"I just fired myself from further commentry in email"
Cunstable Willy Shonka
Location: da 'Berra, da mountains, da gutter
Likes: To blame his tools; Unaligned head tubes; Wild Places; Bustin Wonkies; Homebrew, homebrew and more homebrew.
Favourite Expression: "Farkin' amatuers!"
Likes: evil and nasty people
Location: as if she'd tell you
Blurb: Busy, busy, busy, if shes not looking after her gorgeous
8 yr old she's working, studying, riding her bike, rollerblading,
talking... yes that's right, reading, and just relatively enjoying
life to its fullest and always smiling...
Motto: Smile, it's contagious :D
Music: plenty of it!
Location: Canberra : ACT : Australia
28, chick, Scorpio, Year of the Horse, God, Allah etc... yep thats
Favorite Music: eytis?? (you know I do...)
Favorite Books: life of pi??? Oh and the 89th anual hippopotomus
Location: Land of the 'Free' (or somewhere else)
Occupation: doing all things freakbikery, getting very drunk, sharing his wisdom and knowledge; spreading the word.
Location: a nice place
Survival: Graphic Designer (whatever the fuk that is to you)
Occupations: stuff, lots of stuff
Descripition: not religious, kinda sceptical, kinda special, extremely
Leaky Beaver (aka. Soggy Box)
Location: somewhere outside of Australia
Occupation: starting another Rat Patrol Chapter in Canada
Descripition: tough guy, scared of snakes
Quote: "OOOOOOOH, it's a SNAAAAAAAAKE!!"
Location: ACT, Australia
Interests: Freakbikes; Rat Patrol Oz; Homebrew; women, men, beer
Location: sometimes NSW, sometimes USA.
Quote: "It's all fun and games until somebody gets hurt, then it's just fun!"
Looks like: a madman with an afro
Smells like: sauerkraut the day after
Rides like: a fat maniac o/d-ing on diet pills
Likes like: _winks_; long walks on the beach; people who smoke (they’re
tough and cool); all things “tough” and “cool”;
having the hardest arse in rat patrol (challengers to the crown
always welcome!); Scrujette; Sorry ladies (and cute boys) –
Nancy Porker is taken.
Roughcut Richard (aka. Michael Bolt-on)
Location: perhaps it's better if you don't know
Occupation: oh, nobody knows!
Quote: "Thanks for being you..."
Heroes: The Rat Patrol
Location: Here or there...
Occupation: Greenie pub servant
Quote: Don't fok wit da patrol, fool!
Heroes: Super Ted, crazy dudes on freak bikes
Distinguishing features: Known to fall off choppers lots once fed loads o' holy water...
Location: The Flying Pigsty
Blurb: How to choose which of her pretty (and tough) bikes to ride?
Motto: Helmets are cool!
Likes: Beer; summer; that guy with the hardest @rse in rat patrol
Stuff: I wonder if I can knit a bike?
Shirley Schlongtime Fun Faktory
Location: Enroute to Newcastle
Occupation: KK Klub Fun Faktory Manager
Quote: "Are we there yet?!?" and "Farken eh G’areh!"
Heroes: The Rat Patrol
Small Boat Alert
Name: Small Boat Alert
Motto: Environmental stickers don't mean shit when they're stuck to cars
Stuff: Don't go camping with Limp
Location: on the ground, knows what's going down. Just like Loose Brown, uh. Yeah. Uh.
Speedy Lovelace (aka. Queen of Kapooka)
Location: The planet Mars
Motto: Clive Steele was never gonna get through...
Occupation: Doing poos and wees — thinking it's funny too.
Location: France (that's in Europe)
Easily the best aqua rider in Rat Patrol Oz. Owns a triple-high
tallbike and a girlfriend with a hot panel van. Bike making wizard
YoofRats are ones who have built a freakbike, but are less than
18 years of age, so legally prohibited from drinking alcohol...
here lies a great Rat Patrol quandry; for without beer or hard liquor,
where is the beauty in a Rat Induction????? Of course, that's a
rhetorical question — there is no beauty. So, we are not quite
sure what to do about this... so they don't have Rat Names proper,
and haven't been properly initiated into the service yet... but
they will be!!
YoofRat_1 (formerly known as Josh)
Blurb: not old enuff to drink alcohol!
Motto: I'm not quite old enuff to drink alcohol!
Stuff: skool shit
YoofRat_2: Cap'n Flapper
Location: Inner North
Blurb: I go completely CRAZY on red cordial!
Motto: I'm 13 years old, and I DO WHAT I WANT!
Stuff: skool n' bike shtuff
It's a kind of honorary membership. They are the ones who somehow
manage to get themselves counted as Rats proper, yet don't have
to do a freakin' thing to prove it. How they manage to do that??
Bearely worth a photo, except that we love them dearly. Anyways,
here they are...
High-brow rockstar of near-world-renown status. He is Red Rocko,
nobody really knows who he is. Or is it, that nobody knows if he
exists? I can't remember, it's a bit hazy. He plays the musiks with
guitar and mouth. He does real good.
He plays siiic musiks when we ride, at parties and late at night
— he's our DJ, so we had to give him a RatName. Oh, he also
has large testis. Oh, and he rides pretty well after gigs with much
vodka— we like people like that.
TOF Horsie Head
Our cherished award from Tongue Of Fire, after driving 10 tallbikes
and crew 1,200km to kick arse at their Tallbike